Are you trying to get
woman attraction and starting conversations, but it doesn’t always “click”?
This week’s dating tips will be in list form, since I’m writing this from the
seventh circle of hell Los Angeles airport. So first we got
3 basic myths of attraction, and then we have 10 points from my personal
Instant Attraction Checklist. These are some of the fastest ways of getting
woman attraction and potentially build a relationship.
Read on.
Myth #1: If it works, keep doing it
A lot of Love Systems
attraction techniques are like “glitches in the
matrix.” They are shortcuts to getting a woman attracted to you much
faster and much more effectively than most women are used to. But if you
only use one of these techniques and keep going back to that, it gets
very obvious and very stale very quickly.
I was sitting in on a recent PUA bootcamp
where there was a student who fit this to a T. His thing was teasing
and funny comebacks. He is really good at them. So you’d see him
approach a group of 9s and 10s, and at first they like him and are
touching him, but within a few minutes it got stale. Because that was
(at the time) all he had, and every time he rolled that out, it was
obvious he was chasing the same great
reactions the women gave him at
the beginning of the conversation.
Once we got him mixing in a
few different kinds of attraction... a mix of intrigue-based attraction
and state-based attraction, a mix of techniques like Cold Reads,
Storytelling, Disqualification, Role Plays, and so on, he became “a cool
guy” instead of “a guy with funny comebacks.”
So... vary it up. Don’t be a one-trick pony. There are a bunch of attraction techniques in
Intro to Attraction; make sure you’re good with more than one or two of them.
Myth #2: Women like ______ aren’t attracted to guys like me
Attraction is NOT logical. Women don’t mathematically calculate your
pluses and minuses. It’s an involuntary emotional process. Like David D
put it, “attraction is not a choice.” If you can do the types of things
that make her feel attracted, she will be.
(Obviously some guys
have some natural advantages. You should cultivate natural advantages
whenever you can. But that does NOT mean you need these advantages to
get the girl you want. For more on this, read my article, “Are you in the SOUP?”)
The challenge is whether she ACTS on this attraction. Which brings us to...
Myth #3: Get her attracted to you, and she’ll date/go home with you
Women get attracted to different guys all the time. Most of the time,
it’s temporary and fleeting. It’s not like a man’s thought process,
which goes something like this:
1. Am I attracted to her?
2. Is she good to go?
3. Alright, let’s do this.
So if you’ve ever met a woman who seemed really into you at the time,
but blew you off the next day, don’t worry. This is normal and
correctable.
Solidify and lock in her attraction to you, so it sustains. The best ways to do this are with Qualification (get her to chase you) and Comfort
(get to know each other better so she can reverse-engineer logical
reasons to justify her emotional attraction to you). Do them in that
order.
Never build
Comfort before Attraction. If you’re in any doubt on this one, read the Love Systems Triad – it’s a page:
http://www.bzaleel.com/hackingher.php
This by the way is why a lot of “flakes” happen. She was interested in
you at the time she gave you her phone number, but it was all fun and
fleeting. If she didn’t have to invest in you and there’s nothing in
particular she remembers about you other than you had a fun
conversation, then it might not go anywhere.
Instant Attraction Checklist
These are some of the most powerful ways to
attract a girl:
1.
Touch (appropriately) early, touch often.
If you’re just a “talking head” you’ve neutered your chances. Remember,
attraction is emotional. Touching creates an emotional response. If
you’re not confident with social touch, check out the Beyond Words Home Study Course or Volume 2 of the PUA Routines Manual with lots of physical escalation routines, i.e. ‘excuses’ to start and
escalate the touching.
2.
Slow it down. Talk slower and deeper than normal. And like Cajun says in
Beyond Words, move like you are under water.
3. Women take major cues off
your shoes and your hair. Luckily, these are easy games to win. Shoes = clean and hair = fashionable, not boring.
4.
Eyes-feet reflex.
When you see someone interesting, walk toward her with a small smile.
Right away. 98% of the time, you lose the opportunity or you creep her
out by waiting.
5. Come in with an energy level
at, or slightly higher than, hers. Anything else will be disconcerting to her.
6.
It’s not a %#*()ing job interview.
Asking her tons of questions contributes nothing to the conversation,
makes her do all the work, tells her nothing about you, and reminds her
of the last 500 losers who had nothing to say. Use statements and
guesses wherever possible, and don’t ask two questions in a row.
7.
Project your voice. Trained actor Vercetti has the last word on this, so I’ll defer to him here.
8.
Have something to say.
It’s like an old sports call-in show I used to listen to, where Jim
Rome would tell his callers to “have a take, and don’t suck.” You
approached her. You’re going to be responsible for 90% of the
conversation for the first few minutes (and remember rule 6 if you think
you’re going to get around this by asking questions).
9.
Everything is ALWAYS going exactly as planned.
Love Systems instructor Future had a great segment on this at the last
Super Conference. Bouncer moving you? Some other guy won’t leave her
alone? Bar closing early? Her friend being a cockblock? Act like you’ve
seen it all before and it’s to be expected. Handle what needs to be
handled, but don’t be flustered or thrown off.
10.
Have fun on getting woman attraction.
Emotions are contagious. If you treat it like a job or a visit to the
dentist, the odds will be against you. Go places where you have fun. Go
with people you have fun with. One of my old haunts had an old-school
pinball machine. If I got knocked out of state, a quick beer and a game
of pinball and I was right back there. Or I’d make sure to run the Secretary Opener the next time.
Take care,
Nick Savoy